and, this one is for him.

i love when you tell me it's going to be okay. and i know, i have every ability to think that on my own, but there's just something about you saying it that gets to me. you protect me, and i know that if you're here, everything is going to be okay. you're here for me, and you fight for me, and i can trust you. it's this feeling i've never really felt before. but it reassures me, and comforts me, and calms me down. you, as smart and strong and brave as you are, having such a confidence in me is the best thing in the world. you make me feel like it really is going to be okay, and even if it isn't you'll be right there beside me.

you get this look in your eyes when you're thinking really hard, dwelling on all the possible things that could happen. and i can tell you're thinking about so many things, all the what if's and maybes and could have beens. and then you find me. and the look changes, from a possibility to a reality, and it all feels so real again. and you listen like no one i've ever known, and you hear exactly what i'm trying to say even if my words are a million miles away. and i can't help but feel like the luckiest girl in the world, because all anyone ever wants to feel is exactly what you give me every day.

and sometimes i get scared, because i'm me. but it's okay. because we don't know what tomorrow will bring, but we don't focus on the future because we're sick of losing today. i have your hand. and your love, and committment and promise. and you told me you weren't going anywhere. and i trust you. you're the kind of boy i used to dream about. your loving heart has been the biggest blessing, and so i appreciate today with you. not knowing what tomorrow will bring, but not letting that stand in the way of today. because today i love you. all of you. today you make me laugh, and today i don't want to be anywhere besides in your arms. today you encourage me and strengthen me, and today you're all i could ever ask for. today you're a blessing, and today you remind me of such a selfless love. today when i cry, the way you comfort me is real, and i know that this is right. today i want to scream thank you at the top of my lungs for not giving up. for proving yourself. for not turning your back when it woud have been so much easier. for making me feel like i'm worth the fight. today i need you to know how scary it is to care for you so deeply, but i know it's all for a reason. today i want you to know you never let me down. today i want to be with you for always, because i can't even imagine a reason why that would change. today i want you to be happy, and i want you to know that you are more incredible then your humble heart would ever dare to dream. today i want you to know that i believe in you and i know you can do anything you set your mind too, and today i want you to know i'm not going anywhere. and, not tomorrow either.

and so, my love, here's to today, falling asleep as you whisper softly in my ear "it's going to be okay."